I left off on the night before I was going in to be induced. Like I said, I'd had contractions on and off on Sunday, but nothing consistent. I slept fairly well, but was up bright and early because we had to leave for the hospital at 7:00 AM.
Two days shy of 42 weeks pregnant. BLESS.
I got up, showered, did my hair, and grabbed a few more things to take to the hospital. My mom was sweet enough to get up early and make me a delicious breakfast since I didn't know how long it would be before I could eat again. By this time, those random contractions had all but stopped. Lovely. I had really thought that they might be the onset of labor, but no such luck.
I knew I was going to wake up Griffin before we left to say goodbye, but he ended up waking on his own. We got him out of bed and I got some good snuggles before we took some pictures and headed out.
Surprisingly, I was not the hot mess I expected to be when I said goodbye to my first baby. I thank God for that because anyone who knows me would've probably bet on us having a DEFCON 3 emotional situation. Griffin didn't seem to be alarmed that we were leaving because I wasn't having a total meltdown. Once again, thank you, Lord.
I was also at complete peace about being induced. I knew that I'd given it 12 days past my due date and that it was time for her to come out. I think that's another reason why I was so calm leaving Griffin; we'd had 12 days to have our "lasts", if you will.
I was also at complete peace about being induced. I knew that I'd given it 12 days past my due date and that it was time for her to come out. I think that's another reason why I was so calm leaving Griffin; we'd had 12 days to have our "lasts", if you will.
We got to the hospital shortly before 7:30 and went up to labor and delivery. They got us in our room pretty quickly and then my friend Janelle who is a labor and delivery nurse came in to say hello. I was so disappointed because her shift had just ended when we came in, but I was able to talk to her about some questions and fears that I had and she put my mind at ease. She also had chosen my delivery nurse and told us we would love her.
My last birds-eye belly shot!
After Janelle left, our L&D nurse Dani came in and introduced herself. She knew we wanted another natural birth, aside from the Pitocin, and was very supportive of that. I knew I liked her right away; she had a fantastic bedside manner.
Soon after Dani started getting everything ready, the anestheisiologist came in to say hello. She was incredibly kind and gave me her spiel and asked me some questions. I shared with her that as long as it was safe for the baby, we were planning to have another natural birth (except for the Pitocin, obviously). She wished us well and left.
Dani checked me and said I was still at 3.5 cm and about 70-80% effaced. Once she got my IV set up and the Pitocin started pumping (a little before 9:00 AM), she strapped me to the fetal heart rate monitor and said I could pretty much do what I wanted-- walk, sway, bounce, etc. I decided that I wanted to walk for awhile, so Tyler and I walked around the floor for about 45 minutes to an hour. While we were walking, my mom arrived. She was a great support to me during Griffin's labor and delivery and we'd decided to have her join us for the labor process once again.
We ended up going back to the room around 9:45 and I tried some different positions. I stood and swayed for awhile and then rocked back and forth while standing up. I remember that I really started to feel the contractions while I was swaying. I eventually ended up back in the bed.
We turned on a movie, but shortly after it started, things started to get more intense. I remember just laying on my side, but shifting back and forth as I could. I labored on my side for quite a few hours with Griffin as well. My mom and Tyler were great; they kept asking what they could do for me, but for a long time, I just wanted to be quiet and focused. They were very respectful of this. It was really encouraging for me to know they were there if/ when I needed them. I labored quietly and on my left side for probably close to an hour before I really needed Tyler.
Like I said, it was around 10 am when my contractions really started to get intense. I'd heard Pitocin contractions were awful, but I'm going to tell you what-- you can't comprehend how awful until you actually have them. My Pitocin contractions were much worse than my worst transition contraction with Griffin. They started out much like regular labor contractions, but they got bad so, so fast.
Starting at 10:00 am, I had contractions every two and a half minutes. I absolutely could not get on top of them. They were coming so fast and they were so intense that I could barely breathe through them. I was trying every position in the book and it truly felt like one continuous contraction. It was so much different than my labor with Griffin; his was long and intense, but I could get on top of the contractions and come down off of one before the next started.
There was none of that this time. They came and they came and they came. And they were horrible.
Dani was so diligent about coming to check on me every 30 minutes on the dot. At 11:30, we expressed to her that I was struggling big time (as if she couldn't figure that out on her own) and we asked if she would check me. She did and I was only at a 4. If you can't do basic math, that's only one half of a centimeter in two and a half hours of Pitocin. That's not a whole lot, friends.
I was so discouraged when she told me that. I started crying because I knew I could not do these contractions all day and all night. I just really wasn't progressing a whole lot and I was already exhausted. I labored on the bed for another thirty minutes before I knew that wasn't going to help anything anymore.
I decided to get in the shower on the birth ball to see if that helped. A little side note for you: Tyler had left his bag in the car (on purpose) when we got the the hospital. I was very bothered by this for some reason. I wanted him to have his basketball shorts, a t-shrit, and flip flops in case I needed him to support me while I was in the shower. So of course, when it came time to shower, he had none of this. Y'all, I FREAKED out. He was wearing his jeans, shoes, and a button down and I was so disturbed that he was going to have WET CLOTHES TO MEET THE BABY OH MY GOSH. You know, because I'm sure that's what my 0 minutes old baby was going to be focused on. The shower was set up in such a way that he was able to help me and not get wet at all, but that was after his nearly 42 weeks pregnant wife practically bit his head off about not having his FLIP FLOPS.
I got in the shower around noon. I bounced and I bounced and I bounced. I sat on that ball and had hot water spraying on my back for each contraction for the better part of an hour. Tyler stayed in that hot bathroom with me, rubbed my shoulders, helped adjust that shower nozzle and held my hand the whole time. I am so thankful he's mine; I couldn't have done one minute of the labor process without him.
While we were in the bathroom, I brought up the e-word... epidural. I was feeling so beat down. I said this before, but I virtually could not get on top of my contractions. It was the most intense physical and psychological pain I've ever felt and this is coming from someone who labored for an unmedicated 21 hours. Pitocin is NO JOKE.
I knew that I could not continue to labor like I was for hours and hours and still have the energy to push out a baby. I remember snoozing off and on between contractions with Griffin, but there was none of that this time. I asked Tyler if he would be disappointed in me if I got an epidural and he couldn't have said no fast enough. He expressed that he wanted me to have the labor experience that was right for me, that he knew I'd been working hard and that I was tired, and that he absolutely wouldn't be disappointed in the slightest.
Truly, I knew he didn't mind either way, but I kept asking him. He kept giving me the same answer, but for some reason, I needed to keep pressing the issue because that's just who I am. See? He's a really good husband.
I cried and he kept talking through things with me until we came to a decision. Again, I'm so incredibly thankful for such a supportive, level headed husband who understood my desires for a natural birth. I couldn't have asked for a better birth partner.
I'm going to finish this up in a few days with one last post. I promise I won't let two weeks go by before I post the last installment. It's important to me that I remember the details of AB's birth and that means being quite wordy, apparently. Thanks for hanging in there!
Soon after Dani started getting everything ready, the anestheisiologist came in to say hello. She was incredibly kind and gave me her spiel and asked me some questions. I shared with her that as long as it was safe for the baby, we were planning to have another natural birth (except for the Pitocin, obviously). She wished us well and left.
Dani checked me and said I was still at 3.5 cm and about 70-80% effaced. Once she got my IV set up and the Pitocin started pumping (a little before 9:00 AM), she strapped me to the fetal heart rate monitor and said I could pretty much do what I wanted-- walk, sway, bounce, etc. I decided that I wanted to walk for awhile, so Tyler and I walked around the floor for about 45 minutes to an hour. While we were walking, my mom arrived. She was a great support to me during Griffin's labor and delivery and we'd decided to have her join us for the labor process once again.
We ended up going back to the room around 9:45 and I tried some different positions. I stood and swayed for awhile and then rocked back and forth while standing up. I remember that I really started to feel the contractions while I was swaying. I eventually ended up back in the bed.
We turned on a movie, but shortly after it started, things started to get more intense. I remember just laying on my side, but shifting back and forth as I could. I labored on my side for quite a few hours with Griffin as well. My mom and Tyler were great; they kept asking what they could do for me, but for a long time, I just wanted to be quiet and focused. They were very respectful of this. It was really encouraging for me to know they were there if/ when I needed them. I labored quietly and on my left side for probably close to an hour before I really needed Tyler.
Like I said, it was around 10 am when my contractions really started to get intense. I'd heard Pitocin contractions were awful, but I'm going to tell you what-- you can't comprehend how awful until you actually have them. My Pitocin contractions were much worse than my worst transition contraction with Griffin. They started out much like regular labor contractions, but they got bad so, so fast.
Starting at 10:00 am, I had contractions every two and a half minutes. I absolutely could not get on top of them. They were coming so fast and they were so intense that I could barely breathe through them. I was trying every position in the book and it truly felt like one continuous contraction. It was so much different than my labor with Griffin; his was long and intense, but I could get on top of the contractions and come down off of one before the next started.
There was none of that this time. They came and they came and they came. And they were horrible.
Dani was so diligent about coming to check on me every 30 minutes on the dot. At 11:30, we expressed to her that I was struggling big time (as if she couldn't figure that out on her own) and we asked if she would check me. She did and I was only at a 4. If you can't do basic math, that's only one half of a centimeter in two and a half hours of Pitocin. That's not a whole lot, friends.
I was so discouraged when she told me that. I started crying because I knew I could not do these contractions all day and all night. I just really wasn't progressing a whole lot and I was already exhausted. I labored on the bed for another thirty minutes before I knew that wasn't going to help anything anymore.
I decided to get in the shower on the birth ball to see if that helped. A little side note for you: Tyler had left his bag in the car (on purpose) when we got the the hospital. I was very bothered by this for some reason. I wanted him to have his basketball shorts, a t-shrit, and flip flops in case I needed him to support me while I was in the shower. So of course, when it came time to shower, he had none of this. Y'all, I FREAKED out. He was wearing his jeans, shoes, and a button down and I was so disturbed that he was going to have WET CLOTHES TO MEET THE BABY OH MY GOSH. You know, because I'm sure that's what my 0 minutes old baby was going to be focused on. The shower was set up in such a way that he was able to help me and not get wet at all, but that was after his nearly 42 weeks pregnant wife practically bit his head off about not having his FLIP FLOPS.
I got in the shower around noon. I bounced and I bounced and I bounced. I sat on that ball and had hot water spraying on my back for each contraction for the better part of an hour. Tyler stayed in that hot bathroom with me, rubbed my shoulders, helped adjust that shower nozzle and held my hand the whole time. I am so thankful he's mine; I couldn't have done one minute of the labor process without him.
While we were in the bathroom, I brought up the e-word... epidural. I was feeling so beat down. I said this before, but I virtually could not get on top of my contractions. It was the most intense physical and psychological pain I've ever felt and this is coming from someone who labored for an unmedicated 21 hours. Pitocin is NO JOKE.
I knew that I could not continue to labor like I was for hours and hours and still have the energy to push out a baby. I remember snoozing off and on between contractions with Griffin, but there was none of that this time. I asked Tyler if he would be disappointed in me if I got an epidural and he couldn't have said no fast enough. He expressed that he wanted me to have the labor experience that was right for me, that he knew I'd been working hard and that I was tired, and that he absolutely wouldn't be disappointed in the slightest.
Truly, I knew he didn't mind either way, but I kept asking him. He kept giving me the same answer, but for some reason, I needed to keep pressing the issue because that's just who I am. See? He's a really good husband.
I cried and he kept talking through things with me until we came to a decision. Again, I'm so incredibly thankful for such a supportive, level headed husband who understood my desires for a natural birth. I couldn't have asked for a better birth partner.
I'm going to finish this up in a few days with one last post. I promise I won't let two weeks go by before I post the last installment. It's important to me that I remember the details of AB's birth and that means being quite wordy, apparently. Thanks for hanging in there!

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